recommended soundtrack: red light, by johnny lang
“He wants to say good-bye.”
She holds out the phone. Less than six hours to go. See your reflection in the hall mirror and suck in. Nothing left but slogans and cheers until the bell sounds. This is what a fighter feels like.
“Hello?”
“You’re really going?”
“Yeah. I can’t believe it all worked out. It’s almost a miracle, how the visas came through just three days ago, and…”
“You’ve got to listen to me. Are you listening?”
“Yeah.”
“I want you to listen now. You know, you’ve done a lot of things that are good, and I admire what you want to do, but you’re making a mistake.”
“Um, I’m not sure I understand what…”
“Listen! Are you? I know a lot about what you’re doing and about that area of the world. I’ve been reading. And I have a lot of friends who know about it. OK? I know what I’m talking about. This is not a safe time for you to go there. This is not. Maybe someday, but not now! You have kids, and a wife, and they’re your responsibility. If something happens to them… And I know that you think it’s important to do these cool adventure things, but sometimes you need to make choices that put others first. Do you understand me?”
“I think so.”
“I know you say you’ve prayed, and this is God leading you and all of that. I understand that. But sometimes, you know, you need to make your own choices. You have freedom to choose what you need to do. You can’t just say that it’s God’s will. You have freedom of choice here. Do you understand?”
“I think…”
“I’m saying this because I don’t want you to make a huge mistake. It’s not too late to change your plans.”
“Well, I th…”
“I’m saying this because I care about you and your family. This could ruin all of you forever. You carry the blame.”
“Umm. I appreciate your honesty.”
“We’ll be praying for you.”
“Thank you. We’ll be praying for you, too.”
“We don’t need the prayer! Pray for yourself! It’s never too late to change your plans. Your plans might not be perfect. It might just be stubbornness instead of faithfulness. Don’t think that you need to do it just because you thought one time that it would be good.”
“I understand. Thanks for your concern.”
“So, you still going to do this?”
“Yes. We…”
“Big mistake. Big. Goodbye.”
Your stomach hangs over your belt. Lean against the wall and rub your temples. If you believe, you will see the glory of God. Inhale. Shake it off. Commence farewell.
